You Have a Choice

You can not make someone love you the way you believe you should be loved. You can only see how someone loves and then decide if it’s enough.

I have been thinking about love a lot lately. How about we choose our counterparts, what we love about them and what complain about. What we accept and how we ourselves choose to love.

What I have come to notice is that we all have our baggage, boundaries, issues if you will and that affects how and what we are willing to give.

Often times we tend to fall in love with potential or words that don’t match actions. The hope of what can be..then we are hurt, upset or angry at the other person for being who they are.

This is where forming and having boundaries is critical in maintaining balance and peace within ourselves.

The truth for me is that blaming someone else for not loving me how believe I should be loved, whether that be…not being cheated on, or not being treated like an option, or not being spoken to any type of way or whatever it is that the person I am dealing with does that I allow to hurt me gives them too much power. You cannot make anyone do or be or act a certain type of way simply because you want them to.

And I am not saying that there is some fantasy world where everyone is perfect and has it all together but I am saying you have a choice. You have a choice to get to know and see how someone loves, what they are capable and willing to give and then decide if that is enough.

For me this does two things releases the other person from being a villain in my story and makes them simply human, working through their own stuff trying to navigate life just like the rest of us. It also release me from being the victim and allows me to be at peace whether i stay or go knowing we both are simply giving what we have to give in that moment.

Maybe it’s enough, maybe it’s not but in the choice to decide is where your power and your peace lie.

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