All my life it feels like I’ve been “broken”. Choosing relationships that fulfill expectations of brokenness. Allowing my pain to seek out more pain. Shying away from the foreignness of love that doesn’t hurt because of fear that love like that would see my cracks and breaks and eventually despise my “brokenness”.
Now I see how the narrator in my head pulled lines spoken and experiences that I would easily accept and labeled me broken. Broken in itself is a word I used to justify staying so.
I am taking back my power and proclaim I am healing not broken.
I am releasing pain inflicted by people who were broken themselves.
Healing wounds of abandonment and abuse I allowed to fester and become starring actors in my story.
No longer allowing the hurtful words of others who couldn’t manage their own pain to define me or set the rules for what I deserve and what I will accept in my life.
I will be aware enough to know that someone not loving me as I would like or need to be loved does not make them bad it makes them human, we are all battling our own demons and people can’t give what they do not have.
But I will also be strong enough to know when something isn’t right for me and to let go no matter how hard not with hate or anger but with love for myself.
I’m a work in progress but I am healing not broken…